“It’s weird,” she said. “This is one of the biggest accomplishments of my life, but it doesn’t feel like it.”
This person shared that in just over a month, she’d be the first person in her family to graduate from college. It was difficult not having her family's support, but she shared that she'd always felt like the black sheep of her family, so she was used to it and preferred to focus on what was next.
She planned to join the AirForce, and had dreams of using her education to help homeless Veterans in the future. Growing up she saw many family members who were Veterans struggle to get civilian jobs due to mental illness.
For herself, she dreamed of being able to do things not because she needed to to survive, but because she wanted to. She aspired to be able to make choices for her life to support her own mental wellbeing. “I hope my story can inspire others to push for what they want, no matter what they’ve gone through,” she said.
Listener Poet Jenny Hegland
Veterans Affairs Health Care Talent Academy (HCTA)
November 2022
Wrapped
The present is wrapped
in a blanket
of accomplishment,
woven with thick acceptance
made of necessity --
it’s heavy.
At work, I maneuver
a fifty-ton crane;
tie together shipping containers with steel bands
to keep them from moving
when the ship’s at sea.
Who sees me? Wrapped as I am
in this blanket, warm but worn.
I’m about to graduate
from college, first in my family.
I’ve had four years to process
they won’t be there to see it.
I grew up around machines
so the crane is easy.
What’s not is pushing
for what I want
& providing for myself
without asking for help.
The future is wrapped
in a blanket
of accomplishment
softened by struggle,
strengthened by choice,
my choice, to keep me well.
She wanted to help people feel comfortable and transform the shame around colon issues. "I want to talk about things that matter, the things people don't want to discuss. I want to help them feel okay talking about it."
When we met, she was coming off a stretch of nine 14-hour shifts. She was tired but in good spirits.
She reflected on how her resilience was born from moments of shared mirth amid life's trying chapters.
“Life is complex and dirty, but digging in is important to me,” she said. “Maybe if more of us understood history, we could understand each other better.”
We are expected to research, contribute to scholarship, earn grants – all on our own time.
We are expected to research, contribute to scholarship, earn grants – all on our own time.
Every day, I try to see through the patient lens, and I ask: what can we do to change this broken system?
She was very proud of her daughter and has hopes for “a bright future that’s as pain free as possible”
“I’m trying to focus on doing little things to make people feel better during everything that’s going on in the world,” she told me.
“It’s hard to see others struggle,” she said. “How can I help with their struggle without struggling myself?”
"I'd tell her it's OK to be loud...it's OK to challenge and to bring all of you into these spaces where no one looks like you..."
“I'm continuously questioning: did I do it right?" she said. "I’ve always done a good amount of second-guessing, but I’m re-learning how to show up differently.”
“It’s weird,” she said. “This is one of the biggest accomplishments of my life, but it doesn’t feel like it.”
"It changed me; It changed the way I look at life," said this woman about her profound experience during her pregnancy.
“It’s been more challenging than normal lately,” she said. “I’m only one person. It's a struggle for me to say no, but I can’t do everything that’s being asked of me right now.”
"I've been processing how to make the most of the small amount of life we have to live," said this physician.
"I've been processing how to make the most of the small amount of life we have to live," said this physician.
“I like feeling small,” he told me. “Nature has always made me feel small.” He described the sense of wonder that feeling gave him.
“I feel like I have decision fatigue,” she told me. It was normal for her to make many choices at work, but COVID had dramatically increased the number of medical decisions she had to make at home.
“I know ‘vibe’ is kind of a nonspecific term, but I think about people’s vibes all the time,” he said.“ Sometimes you come into a room and it’s just off.
This physician discussed being the only one in his practice network with expertise in patients with a specific type of chronic pain.
“Our constituents are uniquely affected by the pandemic,” they said. This poemee was an educational psychologist who spoke about how much they missed working in person with med students, healthcare staff, and medical educators.