“There’s a constant feeling inside that I should be doing more,” she said.
“But I also want to be kind to myself and recognize all that I’ve given.”
This person was a physician. She had been reflecting on how she could best use her time and skills without burning herself out.
She told me she was trying not to let the guilt take over, because there was a constant need for volunteers to oversee vaccine clinics and provide education in the community, and these were things she cared deeply about.
She wanted the poem to be a reminder that she didn’t need to do everything right now, and that it was ok to slow down and replenish herself. “For the long-term, it’s important I care for myself and be kind to myself, too, so I’ll be able to do the same for others,” she said.
Listener Poet Jenny Hegland
Association of American Medical Colleges
March 2021
A Kind Reminder
There's no shortage
of the kind of kind
you extend every day
to your patients
your pup, your family;
to your community
and strangers alike.
Kindness comes from
abundance within you.
Kindness IS you!
There could never
not be enough–
You could never
not be enough.
“I always believe, no matter what the doctor says, that I will be cured,” she says as her sister sits next to her.
“I wonder if these medical professionals, in caring for people who face such insurmountable odds, walk around all the time carrying this weight I’m hauling now.”
He had been trying to cope with the grief ever since and was on a quest for soul-searching and meaning-making.
She spoke about the ways this traumatic event shaped who she is today: a person with an “unshakeable peace” born of deep faith,
She wanted to help people feel comfortable and transform the shame around colon issues. "I want to talk about things that matter, the things people don't want to discuss.
When we met, she was coming off a stretch of nine 14-hour shifts. She was tired but in good spirits.
She reflected on how her resilience was born from moments of shared mirth amid life's trying chapters.
“Life is complex and dirty, but digging in is important to me,” she said. “Maybe if more of us understood history, we could understand each other better.”
We are expected to research, contribute to scholarship, earn grants – all on our own time.
We are expected to research, contribute to scholarship, earn grants – all on our own time.
Every day, I try to see through the patient lens, and I ask: what can we do to change this broken system?
She was very proud of her daughter and has hopes for “a bright future that’s as pain free as possible”
“I’m trying to focus on doing little things to make people feel better during everything that’s going on in the world,” she told me.
“It’s hard to see others struggle,” she said. “How can I help with their struggle without struggling myself?”
"I'd tell her it's OK to be loud...it's OK to challenge and to bring all of you into these spaces where no one looks like you..."
“I'm continuously questioning: did I do it right?" she said. "I’ve always done a good amount of second-guessing, but I’m re-learning how to show up differently.”
“It’s weird,” she said. “This is one of the biggest accomplishments of my life, but it doesn’t feel like it.”
"It changed me; It changed the way I look at life," said this woman about her profound experience during her pregnancy.
“It’s been more challenging than normal lately,” she said. “I’m only one person. It's a struggle for me to say no, but I can’t do everything that’s being asked of me right now.”
"I've been processing how to make the most of the small amount of life we have to live," said this physician.